Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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