Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
now i know why i became what i already was.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Randomize
