I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
