dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize