So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
