I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
it glows. i had to have it.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
