i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Randomize
