I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
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