we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
We just shotgunned beers for America
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
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