Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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