you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
