i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
That was before I lit my hair on fire
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
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