coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
