Pappa wants mamma naked
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Randomize
