I just threw up on my dentist
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
