Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
