what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
