dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Randomize
