Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
