i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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