I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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