didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
