who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
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The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Watching her eat just hurts me
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
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Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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