i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize