Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I could fuck to npr.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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