I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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