I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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