Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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