that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
