I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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