Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize