Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
