We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
my poor anus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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