What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
