when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
