Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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