obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize