Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
