I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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