I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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