sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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