If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
