He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.