How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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