whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
i need some magic done to my vagina
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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