It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
My feet surprised me
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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