dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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