I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
