i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Randomize
