So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize