Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
high people should be assigned attendants
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
